About to explode from a lack that you don’t even know what it’s for.
About to explode from a lack that you don’t even know what it’s for. The fact that you’re unknowing is both soothing and worrisome. You realize that this internal little big bang needs to happen. You realize you’re not the director of this movie. You’re not even the lead.
You see all kinds of problems and it’s as if you relate them all to yourself, as if it’s you that…
You see all kinds of problems and it’s as if you relate them all to yourself, as if it’s you that needs to solve them. But what if it’s enough that you take a little step outside of you, as if leaving yourself on the side for a bit. Freedom is not a personal concept.
Dead or alive, how do you know?
Dead or alive, how do you know? No, really, I mean, you see yourself in the mirror, you see others’ reactions towards your appearance; does it mean you’re alive kicking? Or is it the feeling — to feel alive is to be alive? Or is it something else? Something not related to you.
You keep pretending.
You keep pretending. It’s not that you’re trying to hide or cover something up. It’s more of a reflex, something we need to do to “stay alive” in this society. You see a little awakening though, a need for change. You relax a little, stop pretending a little. You’re an example.
Don’t say you don’t have a clue.
Don’t say you don’t have a clue. Of course you know what’s going on. You say you don’t, and you’re right. It’s not that it’s clear and all staked out. But the fact that you go on — that’s the proof that you know. It doesn’t matter how much you complain. You’re still on top.
You imagine you are giving up.
You imagine you are giving up. You even think you are. But the process just goes on. Your consent matters. But it’s not the main thing. You being forced is not the end of the world. Your will is not something holy. Your desires are building blocks. You advance. Everything’s fine.